The Whiney City

[Crash Course]

In the 10/11/04 edition of SI, on page 59, you can find this:

WORLD'S SMALLEST VIOLIN AWARD To White Sox designated hitter Frank Thomas, 36, who, having exercised a one-year, $6 million contract option (down from the $9.9 million he was paid in 2002) said "After the year I had last year, it's a little disappointing come the first and the 15th."

Oh, the pain of The Big Hurt. It's amazing that he can even walk the streets of Chicago with all that shame on his shoulders.

On the other side of town, Sammy Sosa is not making any friends. According to ESPN.com:

Sammy Sosa was fined $87,400 -- one day's salary -- for arriving late to the Cubs' regular-season finale at Wrigley Field and leaving the game early. The slugger's agent said Thursday that Sosa intends to file a grievance.

Sosa arrived 70 minutes before Sunday's first pitch, and he apparently left 15 minutes after the game started without ever putting on his uniform, according to security cameras in the team's parking lot at Wrigley Field. Sosa told the Chicago Sun-Times he was in the clubhouse until the seventh inning.

After hearing that manager Dusty Baker told reporters he wanted Sosa to be in top shape next season, an angry Sosa told the newspaper he was tired of Baker blaming him for the Cubs' failures.

Poor Slammin' Sammy. I mean, the Cubs expect him to hang out for a huge three hours while the last game of the season is being played? The nerve! This is Sammy Sosa, after all.

Just what is going on in Chicago? And, it's just not about the players. At U.S. Cellular Field (formerly Comiskey Park) fans attack coaches and umpires. At Wrigley Field, concrete is falling from the sky on fans.

Between the whining players and the ballpark situations in Chicago, this is not exactly the best of times for baseball fans in the Windy City.

Oh, but, wait, this just in: Last time the Cubs won a World Series was 1908 and the last time the White Sox won a World Series was 1917.

Ouch. Make that not exactly the best century for baseball fans in Chicago.

Maybe instead of playing/singing "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" during the 7th inning at games in Chicago, they should try a little retro-80's with a Nik Kershaw song?

I got it bad
You don't know how bad I got it
You got it easy
You don't know when you got it good
It's getting harder
Just keeping life and soul together
I'm sick of fighting
Even though I know I should
The cold is biting
Through each and every nerve and fibre
My broken spirit is frozen to the core
Don't wanna be here no more

Wouldn't it be good to be in your shoes
Even if it was for just one day
And wouldn't it be good if we could wish ourselves away
Wouldn't it be good to be on your side
The grass is always greener over there
Wouldn't it be good if we cold live without a care

You must be joking
You don't know a thing about it
You've got no problem
I'd stay right there if it were you
I got it harder
You couldn't dream how hard it got it
Stay out of my shoes
If you know what's good for you
The heat is stifling
Burning me up from the inside
The sweat is coming through each and every pore
Don't wanna be here no more

Wouldn't it be good to be in your shoes
Even if it was just for one day
And wouldn't it be good if we could wish ourselves away
Wouldn't it be good to be on your side
The grass is always greener over there
And wouldn't it be good if we could live without a care

It couldn't make things in Chicago any worse, could it?

[JamesI]

Frank Thomas has whined more about money than any player I can remember.